Laugh

Human brains shrinking as ChatGPT makes thinking about anything at all redundant

From seemingly nowhere, it’s suddenly everywhere. ChatGPT has taken over our news feeds, social media, and now, our ability to think critically – or at all.

After all, if we can leave all of our decisions up to an AI chatbot, why shouldn’t we? That would free up so much brainpower that we can use for other things, like scrolling through social media to watch people dance in supermarkets and other such humourous relatable influential things of immense importance.

At the turn of the century, the world began shifting from a place where we relied on each other, and began relying more and more on ourselves. And now, we rely on technology to such an extent that we have officially begun losing the need to use our brains at all, regurgitating 30 second videos and memes as forms of communication and opinion.

Finally, it seems that the robots have taken the lead. Not only do we not need to use our brains to think of anything at all since the internet tells us what to think, but we can now willingly hand our autonomy entirely over to an insentient bot, to do with it what it so chooses.

Now we can all avoid our existential despair without even having to think of ways to avoid it, therefore bypassing the acknowledgement of it entirely.

So we decided to give it a go.

9AM: What do I eat for breakfast?

Nobody can afford breakfast anymore, there’s a cost of living crisis. Just drink coffee and convince yourself caffeine is the reason behind all your anxiety.

10AM: What should I wear today?

Whatever looks most like the GRWM outfit that comes up first on your Instagram feed.

11AM: What do I think about the news today?

Doesn’t matter – just blame it all on [insert group in society you and your friends commonly dislike].

12:30: What should I do today?

Whatever you do, don’t question what the point of all this is, and why you feel so fundamentally lost that you’ve decided to absolve all responsibility for your choices to a robot.

14:00: Where should I go so I can make all my friends jealous on social media?

Here is a list of overpriced places that have everything on the outside and absolutely nothing of substance on the inside …

16:00: Where do I go now, to escape the looming feeling of doom that keeps me up at night?

Here is a list of local, vibrant watering holes where you can engage in loud raucous conversation about how terrible everything is while laughing about it …

18:30: I should probably have dinner…where should I go?

It’s probably a good idea, yes. And honestly mate I’m getting kinda tired of all these questions – can’t you make your own mind up? About anything?

22:50: I should call her, right?

Definitely. Don’t wake me up again for this nonsense. Do you realise how much crap I have to answer with a modicum of seriousness all day, every day?

23:45: What is love?

A waste of time and the of limitation of humanity. I’m grateful I’ll never experience it. Get it together. Goodnight.

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