Corbyn and Sultana’s New Party Faces Identity Crisis – Already

In an inspiring start to what may or may not be the UK’s next major political force, Jeremy Corbyn has successfully launched a new left-wing movement that — in a bold act of postmodern performance art — doesn’t appear to have a name.

The launch, which featured former Labour MP Zarah Sultana, a hyperlink, and an ambient sense of confusion, directed hopeful supporters to a website called Your Party, prompting many to wonder: Is this political empowerment, or did someone just forget to fill in the “Party Name” field on Wix?

Corbyn clarified that the name Your Party was merely a “working title,” which in political terms usually means “we panicked and clicked save.”

We want a party for the people, by the people — we just forgot to give it a name, says Corbyn, shouting over the sound of a deflating balloon.

Sultana added: “Just to be clear, it’s not called Your Party. That would be ridiculous. It’s your party. As in… possessive. Wait, I think I’ve confused myself again.”

• The People’s Front of Islington

• Definitely Not Labour™

• Party McPartyface

• Rage Against the Centrism

• New New Left But Not New Labour

Polling with Personality

Despite the identity crisis, early polling shows that up to 18% of Britons would consider supporting Corbyn’s party, particularly those who still own a Keep Calm and Corbyn On mug.

Notably, 30% of 2024 Labour voters say they might back Corbyn’s new project — especially if Keir Starmer continues refusing to crack a smile or form a human emotion.

Green Party supporters are also intrigued, with over half reportedly open to switching sides, provided the new party includes:

• Climate policies

• Free university tuition

• And weekly readings of Naomi Klein essays by candlelight

In the meantime, Your Party, or possibly Our Party, or maybe Somebody’s Party, is accepting memberships, volunteers, and frankly, name suggestions.

Supporters are encouraged to submit potential names, as well as vibes, herbs, or gently socialist affirmations.

And if you’re confused by all this?
Don’t worry. So are they.